Archive for the 'Blackout' Category

Like a flamboyant zen master dastardly stroking his Fu Manchu mustache, a gentleman wills every elegant evening of drinking into existence by first envisioning it in his mind’s eye. However, remembering said evening—from the very first pinky-raised sip of his very first sensible cocktail to the moment just before he belly flops onto the barroom [...]


A Gentleman Dazzles at a Wedding

September 18th, 2009

Ahh wedding season! Following the gentleman’s proud display of leadership and courage at the groom’s bachelor party, where he no doubt distinguishly extinguished the gin supply and made charitable donations to the lovely ecdysiasts, a gentleman will attend the main event with gusto and gallantry. While sashaying to the soft rock jams of the band, [...]


A gentleman hardly considers his outright market domination and boardroom brilliance labor-intensive, yet he still makes the time to celebrate the hard work of the office-drones. As the final holiday of the summer season, a gentleman uses Labor Day parties to retire his summertime, sartorial ensemble. Sporting an immaculate seersucker jacket, a flamboyant shirt and [...]


A gentleman is nothing if not one big bottomless cocktail of class. Zig-zagging down the street with a brown-bagged highball in one gloved hand and devilishly spinning his bow tie with the other while making AHH-OO-GAH eyes and wolf-whistling at every female he passes, our champion not only exudes elegance and sophistication, he embodies it. [...]


A Gentleman Is MacGyver-ish

July 23rd, 2009

A gentleman is well known to be an extremely resourceful individual, one who constantly balances creativity with deft scientific know-how to face any challenge that may confront him.  Whether he’s fashioning weapons out of office supplies during conference calls, cobbling together quick hydraulic smoking apparatuses on lunch breaks, popping the governor off his rented Mexican [...]


A gentleman is fond of a great many literary masterpieces, and certainly enjoys relaxing with some fantastic reading material from his favorite authors, which could include the famous works of Mr. Dickens, Mr Fitzgerald or Mr. Joe Conrad, or perhaps the lighter, more pictorial stories provided by Mr. Hefner or Mr Flynt. Being such an [...]


When a local township goes to throw a large public gathering occasion for its populace, whether it is an annual cobblestone criterium or a fancy elephant parade or simply a seasonal free parking day, they know that no civic event would be complete without the presence of the gentleman. As a natural crowd drawer himself, [...]


Much can transpire in the night of a gentleman. In fact, what’s considered an entire lifetime to some could quite possibly fit within the bookends of a gentleman’s night on the town, a labyrinthine-like quest that begins with the sweet nectar of a summery cocktail and ends with a police escort home. Such evenings are [...]


Whether he is hosting a post-fox hunt champagne toast at his sprawling summer estate or delighting guests at the famous weekly nachos-and-cocktails shindig at his more modest garage apartment, a gentleman always plays a gracious host, one who enjoys going out of his way to make sure his guests are both entertained and dazzled by [...]


Whether she’s attending a delightful whiskey and tea party in prohibition cellars or has just torn up the dance floor at a secret Habsburg holiday ball, a gentlelady always follows up all events with the issuance of a token letter. This letter is sometimes a simple thank you note, but can occasionally take the form [...]