The Foggy Monocle » Blog Archive » A Gentleman Plays A Dastardly Trick

A Gentleman Plays A Dastardly Trick

December 11th, 2008

No matter the professional stature he’s achieved, the foes he’s bested, the wisdom he’s accrued and the bucks he’s stockpiled, a gentleman is never too mature to unleash a gag of most whimsical proportions. Aside from gold bullion, conflict diamonds and IOUs, comedy is the currency of the gentleman, and it’s a greasy lubricant he frequently employs to slide himself out of pesky pickles and into the pants of unsuspecting females. Humor — especially tasteful practical jokes — is also the medium with which he communicates with friends and wins over the affection of strangers, causing them to lift their glasses in unison and proclaim, “Hear, hear for the gentleman and his uncanny ability to concoct the most delightful gags of the season. Bravo and tally-ho and all that jazz!”

Victim: How awesome is it to get my own copy of Natural Harvest: A Collection of Semen-Based Recipes?
Victim: Delivered to my work, where my staff opens my mail?
Prankster: That is my greatest accomplishment ever. I found it on the net (don’t ask how) and immediately had it delivered to your office.
Prankster: I am also proud to say that I got your middle-aged secretary to open a semen cookbook.
Victim: Actually its pretty fucking funny.
Victim: Also, she is a devout born again.
Victim: My coworkers are staring. I’m laughing so hard right now.
Victim: I might keep it 6 months. Then I’ll leave it under a chair at my church.
Prankster: Your generosity is saint-like.

Filed under: Uncategorized.

add 1 RATING: 2

eyeofra
December 11th, 2008 at 3:57 pm

This should go in the top picks list!

tyrone power
December 11th, 2008 at 5:27 pm

agreed. well-played, sir.

DC
December 11th, 2008 at 6:20 pm

That is F’n hysterical. I have to buy a copy for an up-coming white elephant party.

Michael
December 12th, 2008 at 7:45 am

I should totally send it to someone on the Hill…

Princess Poochie
December 12th, 2008 at 9:16 am

Genius!

I’m dying. I wish I had known about this for my work party too.

Steve
December 16th, 2008 at 6:09 pm

People laugh, but most cultures have at least some history of cooking with human and/or animal semen – if only for special occasions. My grandmother said her family used to make the best traditional bull semen pudding in her village. And I think there is still a festival held in the North of Sweden to honor the tradition sugar cookies with special icing. So whether this book was intended or a joke or not, most people DO come from semen eating traditions….