In light of the dipping stocks and faltering economy, gentlemen across the globe are reevaluating their leisure budgets, eliminating frivolous purchases and cutting back on non-essential commodities. This does not mean that gentlemen are acting any less reckless or enjoying life any less to the fullest, but rather are just taking a more frugal approach to their wanton spending, opting for oysters on the half-shell direct from the docks, filling their own bathtubs with bootlegged gin, and heading to the market square for mutton sandwiches on the benches as opposed to the white linen dining to which he is accustomed. Gentleladies are quick to attune themselves to this trend, and are taking a more street-wise approach to meeting new gentlemen by making their presence felt in the less traditional areas.

GentleJill: What’s up with TJ?
RoadieHo: i have to email and remind him he’s got to kick whatever lame girls he’s got hanging around out of his bed for a week while i’m in town. i can maybe mention that he should also not leave condom wrappers from said girls on the floor where i can see them…but i maybe don’t care that much because i am a ho.
GentleJill: I’m glad to hear that you’ll still be banging TJ.  Doesn’t he have family to visit for Thanksgiving?
RoadieHo: i dunno. i should text him and remind him the pussy shop’s in town.
GentleJill: omg.  the pussy cart. hahahahaha
RoadieHo: the pussy trunk show? wait that implies my pussy is big and spacious like a trunk and it is not! exclusive pussy collection? pussy gift with purchase?
GentleJill: I’m into the idea of the pussy cart, like how downtown there is collection of food carts.  portland is really big into the food cart scene. I saw one yesterday that just served waffles and ice cream.  Yours would just serve pussy.  and handjobs on the side…
RoadieHo: it would be more like the bacon wrapped hot dog carts in the mission…open late night/for hipsters.

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