…unless, of course, he gets wasted. Though a Gentleman’s mind is like that of a bear trap, his thirst is like that of a man stranded in the desert — unquenchable! And sometimes a gentleman requires a healthy number of highballs to merely wet his whistle, meaning his mind, though super computer-like in intellect, turns to complete shit, and thus the gentleman simply cannot be accountable for his actions. 

10:32 AM

ClarificationMan: u feeling better?

FoggyGentleman: yes, significantly

FoggyGentleman: how you doing?

ClarificationMan: i got home at 7:30 on saturday with a massive headache

ClarificationMan: pounded water and went to bed

FoggyGentleman: i have some scenes missing from the whole ordeal

10:35 AM

FoggyGentleman: especially toward the end there

ClarificationMan: yeah

ClarificationMan: you were blasted

ClarificationMan: BLASTED

FoggyGentleman: i don’t remember much past Marshall Stack, honestly

FoggyGentleman: did i pay for my food at la esquina?

FoggyGentleman: i can’t remember

ClarificationMan: no idea

ClarificationMan: you had fajitas

ClarificationMan: but you kept calling them tacos

FoggyGentleman: i am guessing that my iPod did not survive?

10:40 AM

ClarificationMan: iPod didnt survive

ClarificationMan: you smashed it

ClarificationMan: you made out with a 45 yr old at the bar

FoggyGentleman: i don’t remember that, but that’s good

ClarificationMan: then you called a guy gay outside

FoggyGentleman: oh no

ClarificationMan: who happened to be gay

FoggyGentleman: yikes

ClarificationMan: then

ClarificationMan: outside

ClarificationMan: there was a chick i bummed a cigarette off

ClarificationMan: and she had the most mangled teeth i have ever seen

ClarificationMan: and she was missing teeth too

ClarificationMan: a bunch of them

ClarificationMan: you come out and go

ClarificationMan: “you are cute as hell!”

FoggyGentleman: oh god

ClarificationMan: and started dancing with her and tried to make out with her

ClarificationMan: luckily she rejected you

FoggyGentleman: oh christ

FoggyGentleman: ok, enough! i want this swept under the rug and never mentioned ever again

FoggyGentleman: my brain made some bad decisions. there was no one on duty to control it at all

FoggyGentleman: time to rebuild the empire

 

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